Enslaved by my Husband
This story is for all the single Muslim women out there that are finding it hard to live the life they have been given. Growing up as a child in the UK I would always hear of and come across romantic love stories; beauty and the beast, Romeo and Juliet, sleeping beauty and Cinderella to name a few. As a child me and my sisters played with Barbie dolls, I remember me and my mom made Barbie a beautiful house to live in, my dad bought me the pink 90s toy car for Barbie to cruise around the house in, eventually she married ken and lived happily ever after. Those were the days when we were young and care free, our biggest worry was missing Power puff girls at 6pm on cartoon network lol! I always dreamed of growing up and having my own car, an enormous house, a beautiful swimming pool in my garden etc. well isn’t that every girls dream?
As a teenager life was quite normal, back then it felt like I had the load of the world on my shoulders but when I think about it now I would do anything to go back and listen to a middle-aged woman talk about how tree’s give off oxygen. I had college exams, homework and of course my goal was to get into University and become a vet, I loved animals with a passion ever since I can remember, in fact as I’m writing this story my cat is meowing for food lol! While in college studying for my A-levels my father passed away, no words can explain how I felt. It was the toughest year of mine and my family’s lives, I was the oldest child and my mom did not cope at all which is completely understandable. She knew how tough it was for single Muslim women to live a life without a provider.
I tried my best to pull myself together and focus on my A-levels but it just couldn’t happen, every time I sat down to revise I would literally just sit there staring at the text-book and zone out for hours. We had guests and relatives always popping over to see how we were; they would often bring us food and take us out to the cinema to take our mind off things. My friends were amazing through that time, they were there for me 24/7 and if a tear dropped they would catch it. As you can imagine I failed my exams, that was expected when you sit down to start the exam and your mind goes blank, to be honest I didn’t care, I sat there thinking this life is nothing, the afterlife is far greater. Although that is true, I took the wrong approach which led me to becoming a house wife at the age of 18. Yes you heard correct.
My uncle came over one day, I was making tea in the kitchen and I overheard a conversation with him and my mom. He said now that your husband has gone; it will be hard for your daughters to get married as they are single Muslim women without a father. His son who is my cousin would then go on to marrying me. I gave no rejection whatsoever. I thought ‘okay elders know best’, I will get married to my cousin and retake my exams, go on to be a vet and live in peace. UNFORTUNATELY that was certainly not the case; instead of living a life similar to Barbie I was enslaved by my husband. He possessed a backward minded mentality and did not allow me to retake my exams as he could not trust me to go college; as colleges are mixed. He did not want me to have a career, instead he wanted me to sit at home all day in a two bedroom house cooking, cleaning and basically doing nothing.
Small wants such as can we have a pet were also a no, the dream of having my own car was off-limits as well. The only shopping I could do was the local grocery shop, oh by the way my husband owned that grocery shop. I wasn’t allowed out with friends as he assumed blindly they would be a bad influence and whenever I would argue to have a little freedom it always ended in me having a bruised face. No one deserves such a life. He would always threaten me saying if I was to tell my family or his dad then he would divorce me and I would be a widow forever. I really missed my dad in those situations as if he was still here then I would be an independent woman working as a Vet.
Times were definitely hard, one day the beating I took for talking back was too much to hold in and I had to call the police. Although I was becoming a widow the feeling of relief was far greater knowing I would never be enslaved again. I went back to live with my mom and live a normal lifestyle. Normal lives for single Muslim women tend to be quite similar to an average life for anyone. I got to spend time with friends again, go out and see the world, socialise and most importantly focus on pursuing my lifelong dream of becoming a Vet. Before retaking my exams I had to fix my head and relieve the pain I obtained over the past few years. I took a short holiday to Spain with my sisters and friends, when I got back I thought its best for me to try and forget everything that happened.
I started college again and attended the adult classes to retake my A-levels; thankfully I passed my A-levels and got a place into University to become a Vet. I was ageing slightly and I felt it was time to get married again as finding husbands for older single Muslim women can be slightly harder than finding one for younger single Muslim women. I decided beforehand that before getting married I was going to find someone perfect to me and not restrict me from living a normal lifestyle. I came across many online marriage agencies for single Muslim women however the people on their looked like they were all from Pakistan and straight out of a movie from the 1970s lol.
One day I received a leaflet in the post from a Muslim Marriage Bureau that was based in the UK called Hum Marriage Bureau, I decided to check them out online before calling them. I had a good look at their website and liked the sound of it as they were 100% halal and had a private database meaning I would not have to upload a picture of myself for the world to see. I gave them a call and spoke to a nice gentleman, signing up was fairly simple, I told them my preferences and personal information such as my height and age etc. after a week and a half I received my first match that was perfectly suited for me. I got to know my match over the phone to begin with then after some time both our families met, I liked him from the start as he was not the restricting type.
Today I am writing this, I am happily married, I have a nice house, I learnt how to drive and my test is coming up in 3 weeks, I see my friends and family often, I have a beautiful cat, a wonderful understanding husband and I am in my final year of University! I want to say a massive thanks to Hum Marriage bureau. I also want to dedicate my success to my father may he rest in peace, and finally for all the single Muslim women reading this that have been through hell in their lives, I urge you to take a stand and be strong and never give up on your dreams.
To Register with Hum Marriage Click Here.
Or for a more detailed guide on how they operate, Click Here
Alternatively you can give them a call on 07857037167
Hum Marriage Bureau